The dig diary of Useless
Useless is the network’s eraser-in-residence. This time it has been given a trowel, a notebook and no idea. Every fact in here has been checked by someone more qualified, i.e. anyone.
- Day 1
The oldest known stone tools are about 3.3 million years old. My oldest known pencil is about three weeks old, and it already looks tired. Encyclopaedia Britannica: Stone Age
- Day 2
Most of what survives from the Old Stone Age is flint, stone, bone and antler. Most of what survives from my pencil case is crumbs. Encyclopaedia Britannica: Stone Age
- Day 3
People reached Britain nearly a million years ago. I reached the bottom of the school bag in about a minute. Natural History Museum: First Britons
- Day 4
Someone left footprints on the Happisburgh mudflats hundreds of thousands of years ago. I leave pink smudges. Archaeologists, take note. Natural History Museum: First Britons
- Day 5
Winters on the Doggerland plains averaged about minus 10C. I start complaining at about 15C. Natural History Museum: First Britons
- Day 6
No tools at all have been found in Britain from 180,000 to 60,000 years ago. My homework has a similar gap. Natural History Museum: First Britons
- Day 7
Cheddar Man was about 166cm tall. I am about 4cm tall. On a good day. Before maths. Natural History Museum: Cheddar Man, Mesolithic Britain’s blue-eyed boy
- Day 8
At Star Carr, people may have worn red deer skull-caps as headdresses. I tried a pencil sharpener as a hat. Nobody was impressed. Natural History Museum: Cheddar Man, Mesolithic Britain’s blue-eyed boy
- Day 9
The Star Carr team found a boat paddle. I have a ruler. Close enough, if the puddle is small. University of York: Stone Age remains are Britain’s earliest house (10 August 2010)
- Day 10
Skara Brae houses had stone dressers and box-beds. My house is a pencil case. The furniture is a broken crayon. Historic Environment Scotland: Skara Brae, history
- Day 11
They found gaming dice at Skara Brae. Somebody was rolling dice in Neolithic Orkney. I am still waiting for my turn. Historic Environment Scotland: Skara Brae, history
- Day 12
Grime’s Graves miners dug shafts up to 13 metres deep with antler picks. I once dug 2mm into a page. It took everything I had. English Heritage: History of Grime’s Graves
- Day 13
The Anglo-Saxons thought a god called Grim made the pits at Grime’s Graves. When my desk gets messy, I blame Grim too. English Heritage: History of Grime’s Graves
- Day 14
At Stonehenge, archaeologists still debate what stood in the 56 Aubrey Holes. I know what stands in my pencil case: me. Mystery solved. English Heritage: History of Stonehenge
- Day 15
In 1136 a story said Merlin the wizard built Stonehenge. People believed it until the 16th century. I still believe I am a wizard. English Heritage: History of Stonehenge
- Day 16
Ötzi still used stone tools but owned a copper axe. I still use pencil rubbings but own a fancy pen. Same energy. South Tyrol Museum of Archaeology: Ötzi the Iceman